Fed Prez Janet Yellen channels Dr Strangelove


A leaked transcript of a phone conversation between a Wall Street bank and U.S President Donald Trump about the Federal Reserve and its plans to hike interest rates to 4% as America struggles with a Great Depression.

The video of the conversation…

 

The transcript…

Now then, Donald. You know we’ve always talked about the possibility of something going wrong with the interest rates  of the Federal Reserve. The bomb, Donald. The interest rate hike bomb. Well now what happened is, the Federal Reserve president, Janet Yellen, she had a sort of, well she went a little funny in the head. You know. Just a little….You know. Just a little….funny. And uh, she went and did a silly thing.
(listens)
Well, I’ll tell you what she did, she ordered the second interest rate increase since 2008 in December and plans to hike the interest rate up to 4%….to destroy the US economy.
(listens)
Well, let me finish Donald. Let me finish, Donald.
(listens)
Well, listen, how do you think I feel about it? Can you imagine how I feel about it, Donald? Why do you think I’m calling you? Just to say hello?
(listens)
Of course I like to speak to you. Of course I like to say hello. Not now, but any time, Donald, and I also love our golf games. I’m just calling up to tell you something terrible has happened.
(listens)
It’s a friendly call. Of course it’s a friendly call. Listen, if it wasn’t friendly, … you probably wouldn’t have even got it. The interest rate increases will not devastate the USA economy for another few months.
(listens)
I am… I am positive, Donald. Listen, I’ve been all over this with your team. It is not a trick.
(listens)
Well I’ll tell you. We’d like to give your team a complete run down of the effects of an a tiny interest rate increase on the disposable income of the average America, the federal debt, the dollar.
(listens)
Yes! I mean, Janet Yellen and Steven Mnuchin do not intend to change, then I’d say that, uh, well, we’re just going to have to help you take them down, Donald.
(listens)
I know they’re our boys. But look I don t civil war in America either. I don’t want to see America financially bombed back into the stone age. I have to live here too, right? I have my 100 million dollar condo in Manhatten. But even I have to go onto the street sometimes, right? As for living with sheep in New Zealand or Hawaii, can that go well?
(listens)
Alright, well, listen… who should we call?
(listens)
Who should we call, Donald?
(listens)
The people…? Sorry, you faded away there.
(listens)
The new trade council under Peter Navarro. Where is that, Donald?
(listens)
In Washington. Right. Yes.
(listens)
Oh, you’ll call them first, will you?
(listens)
Uh huh. Listen, do you happen to have the phone number on you, Donald?
(listens)
What? I see, just ask for Washington Information. I’m sorry too, Donald. I’m very sorry.
Yes, I really am sorry I tricked you about the fact that you can issue your own money as a President like Kennedy and you don’t need to borrow from private banks paying interest. But look, that’s how I have made so much money. I have a family to keep too, right? I know, that my family doesn’t need billions. That’s why I’m calling you, to say, look Janet Yellen and Steven Mnuchin have to be stopped from unleashing the interest rate doomsday machine on the US economy.
(listens)
Alright! You’re sorrier than I am! But I am sorry as well. I am as sorry as you are, Donald. Don’t say that you are more sorry than I am, because I am capable of being just as sorry as you are. So we’re both sorry, alright? I know you are getting jobs back and avoiding the inflationary trap of a gigantic stimulus programme, but they are striking back.

 

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